The Turd’s Prayer

Dear lord in heaven, Creator of all, provider of everything, giver of life and with whom I shall spend eternal bliss, I ask you to please hear my prayer today and allow this enormous turd to finally exit this vessel of a body that you have been kind of enough to bless me with. Oh […]

A Toast To Your Cummupance: May you live a long life...
...so you can see your children and their children die of AIDS,
your spouse battle Alzheimer's and MS;
while you lose control of your bodily functions,
but retain your mental faculties so you can witness it all.
Hear hear, to your long life