Bumpercrop of Failure

Where’s Willie Nelson when you need him?
Throw me a concert, sing me a song, pay your taxes so I can get FEMA to declare my toilet bowl farmland a disaster area and get one of those sweet New Orleans type nonpaybackable loans.

What I am trying to say is that my dream of growing [...]

I'm not proud of it, but I once beat a man to death with his own rectum.