porkjerky plogOne Giant Crap For Mankind
You ever think as a young boy Neil Armstrong looked up into the night sky, held his thumb next to the moon, squinted and dreamed of being the first person to take a dump up there?
I like to think so.
Now it’s true the Russians beat us into shitting in space with Vostok 3 when Andrian Nikolayev dropped some satellites into orbit, as the colloquialism goes. And Valentina Tereshkova’s poop was 20 years old by the time Sally Ride was able to blast her hatch door and have the first american woman’s splashdown. However, to this day, those damn commies have never put a turd on the moon.
USA! USA! USA! USA!
Unfortunately, no one will tell me who exactly the first person to crap on the moon was, but my guess it was either the crew of Apollo 11 (Armstrong/Aldrin) or Apollo 15 (Scott/Irwin). Apollos 11-14 all spent less than 36 hours on the moon, however with what I saw occuring because of nerves before the Boston Marathon, I can fully understand if Neil Armstrong had to pinch an anxious one off in the Lunar Module before taking those famous first steps.
Now, if he didn’t and no one else had to take a nervous poo, then either David Scott or James Irwin had to take a trucker crap (shit in a bag) up there because they spent about 3 days on the lunar surface.
Of course, the most disgusting thing about moon shit, even more revolting than the Apollo Bag system they used, is that no man has dropped a deuce up there in my lifetime.
No one gives a fourth of a cum covered turd what you think, but please don't let that stop you from spreading your insightful wit to the world by commenting below. Or fuck, you're such a pussy-eating faggot you're probably interested in the rss feed of this shitty site. Oy vey.
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