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Current Mood: Shitty (sweet Jesus H. Fuck I am witty)

But Seriously Folks…

My friends, I would like to take just one post out of this shitty plog to talk to you about something serious. Something that affects nearly all of us; a scourge on this country that we must finally confront.

In these trying times it’s on the forefront of all our minds. Something we have been silently contemplating, cursing to ourselves about but too afraid to say out loud. Well, damn it, I’m going to talk about it and I don’t care the consequences.

I’m mentioning the unmentionable, telling you your emperor has no clothes and shedding the light of day onto something we have been tiptoeing around. That’s right, I’m going there, I’m talking about bicameral legislatures of state governments. Nebraskans, you are a true role model for this country (they even split their electoral votes) and are now excused.

Bicameralism is at the forefront of our collective consciousness, but no one is brave enough to broach the subject and demand something be done. Well, I’m hear to start the discussion, light the first torches, pass out the initial pitchforks and lead you all to your state capitals to do only what mob violence can do—eliminate a chamber of your legislative branch of government. They sure as fuck ain’t going to legislate their own worthless legislative asses out of existence.

I mean really, does Idaho need a house and a senate? Wouldn’t the people of South Carolina be better off with just one set of legislators? How much in salary, pension, per diem and other costs do state senators and state representatives cost Michigan each year?

How much significantly different would our world be if every state only had one chamber of legislatures? Would babies be dying in the street? Airplanes falling out of the sky? Pestilence, plague and famine run rampant because we were all to ignorant to see the value bicameral legislatures brought us?

In the immortal words of Cedric the Entertainer, ‘Nigger please’.

I know, I know everyone likes to play grown up and pretend they are real, governments just like their role models. But there is (or at least was) a reason the Federal Government of the United states has 2 chambers—it’s to supposedly protect small states from getting buttfucked by big states. U.S. House of Representative seats get allocated by population to states, U.S. Senate seats get allocated just for being a state. Therefore, California has a shit ton more influence in the House than Wyoming, but in the Senate they have equal say. Of course, since everyone is more loyal to their party than their constituents, its really moot. My point is thought, there is or once was a reason for a bicameral federal legislature.

At the state level there’s no reason for them. Who are you going to fuck over? Are all the shit towns in Kansas going to form a power alliance and to keep all those megalomaniac farmers in check there needs to be a Kansas House of Represenatatives? Is Tennessee going to have a civil war because Knoxville, Nashville and Clarksville’s powers went unchecked when they passed laws enslaving all cities not ending in ‘–ville’?

In life, just because it is and was, doesn’t mean it should be. Let’s all do our part to eliminate worthless bicameral legislatures in our states. I now return you to your regularly scheduled shit.

No one gives a fourth of a cum covered turd what you think, but please don't let that stop you from spreading your insightful wit to the world by commenting below. Or fuck, you're such a pussy-eating faggot you're probably interested in the rss feed of this shitty site. Oy vey.