Literally Wrong, Virtually Legal

R.I.P.->Commemorating Brett Allen Hern With Trash

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Brett Allen Hern
Memorial For Brett Allen Hern

Brett Allen Hern: Not The Smartest Turd In The Urinal

Honestly people, WHORE DAYGO PUKE when a loved one dies you can FART JIZZNUGGET BASTARDBAG lie to yourself all you want about the deceased. You HEB WHORE COCKHOLE CLIT WHORE BASTARDSHITFACE can gawdily memorialize them with all the plastic flowers SHITFIRE WHITETRASH PUSSYBUCKET and crappy cliched wreaths you want. You WARTY CAMELJOCKEY CLIT COCK JIGABOO BITCHHOLE can even adopt a highway in their loving SLUTCOW COCKBUCKET PISS TWATFELCHER memory; which seems to mean a memory where you forget about ASS JIZZ COCK COCK FAGGOT JACKOFF TOWELHEADSLUT them being a universe class dumbfuck. You can do all of that. Its not CUNTLESS ASSNUGGET BASTARD fine with me, but I have come SHITTING SLUT BUTTJIZZCUNT ASSCANUCK to accept that its going to happen. Just know, that when BUTTBREATH BITCH ESKIMO FART TWO-BIT CUNTLESS I post pages to their honest memory it is because your publicity of them lead SNATCH FART FEBRUARY SLUTHOLE me to find the truth about how your retarded loved WHITETRASH NIGGER TURNSTILE SANDNIGGER one died. These pages are your fault.

With a preface like that, you JIZZ TRAPEZOID WHITETRASH SANDNIGGER fucking know that this cross has one cunt of PISSFAGGOT SNATCH COCKHOLE FAGGOTPIMP a good story behind it:

If you take the DICK SLUT ASSGOOK FILTHY SNATCHJEW stupidity of Pete Cuezze to the 5th power then add 3 retards, mix in FUCK BASTARDBUCKET ESOPHAGUS SLUTDICK some brain damage and lobotomize on high for 30 seconds, FAT COCK FAGGOTASSEATER SNATCHFACE TWAT you might get the intelligence of Brett Allen Hern. I usually give a synopsis of DAYGO FARTFACE BITCHWART SACRAMENTO FILTHY CAMELJOCKEY the stories I find to tell the story of how the crosses got FUCKFACE BASTARDFUCK JIZZNUTS FAGGOT there, but this time I am copying verbatim from the newspaper article NASTY CUNT FAGGOT DAYGOWART SLUTBREATH I found:

"Brett Hern, an 18-year-old Independence man, ran out in front of a tractor-trailer SHIT-EATING SNATCHDICK FAGGOTFACE AARDVARK PUKE after parking his pickup truck on the shoulder of Interstate 70 at about 7:30 p.m."

I know what you are thinking and you NASTY SNATCHLESS CUNTMONKEY CRACKER couldn't be more right. Someone needs to e-mail me at jason@porkjerky.com and tell me how little SNATCHBITCHBUTT FAGGOT ASS my dick is and how horribly I need to die.