Dear Delilah, Your Show Sucks
Better Than Dirty Jokes
Guaranteed Pickup Lines
Make Your Own Roadside Memorial|
*Death Sold Seperately
If you're like me, then you're one of these sissy-assed, seat-belt wearing, non-cell-phone having, blind-spot checking, speed-limit obeying, turn-signal using, non-median crossing, undrunk yet defensive driving pussies that hasn't had a pile of blasphemous litter thrown in a highway ditch to remember you by.
Well, I'm here with good news: My girlfriend isn't pregnant. A little less good, but a little more germane: Now you too can get the publicity and pity enjoyed by the Brett Allen Herns of the world, without that not-so-alive feeling that goes with being sodomized by an 18-wheeler.
Fill in the form above to customize your own roadside memorial picture (a la the one atop this page) and start getting the notoriety that being a safe, or at least lucky, driver should command. If you have an actual roadside memorial already or caused someone to get one or just want to let me know about one I should get for my collection, use the Cross Submission Page to let me know about it.