There I was, titty fucking some random skank's nipples off, wondering if that was enough or if I needed to do something else completely pointless for breast cancer. If only there was a gesture equally as empty as wearing a pink bracelet or having a bake sale or throwing a magnetic ribbon on my car or walking with a herd of heifers for 5 kilometers. Something that would show my hollow support without taking any actual effort nor furthering the cause in any real way. Then it hit me like a ton of boobs. This and every October, porkjerky.com will go pink as a lip service tribute to breast cancer. Please follow my magnanimous example and do something meaninglessly worthless that doesn't require any real effort on your part for this great cause. Believe me when I say, it should be the least we can do.
Porkjerky.com
A Grown Assed Website
 

R.I.P.->Honoring Merry Ann With Trash

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Memorial For Merry Ann

Just once, just one fucking time, I want to catch someone in the act of putting up a memorial. I keep a newspaper in my glove compartment in the hope of it happening. I would slam on my brakes, swerve to the shoulder, cut through people's yards, pull a U-turn, drive the wrong way, cut off a cop -- whatever it took to get over to the brainless fuck as fast as possible.

I would grab the newspaper, roll it up, run up on them, grab the back of their neck, drag them right up to the mound they created, yell "No! God damn it. No!", right in their ear. Then I would strengthen my grip on their neck, shake and jerk their head down to the ground, rub their face in it and beat their ass with the newspaper as I go, "No! Bad. Bad. You don't do shit like this. God damn it. No!". Finally, I'd take them to get spayed, neutered, declawed and maybe even a little chemotherapy or bridge work just because I'm a dick.

Mocking crosses on a website is good wholesome fun and all, but because they are so stupid, to teach these piss drinkers that what they are doing is wrong you really have to catch them in the act or they just won't learn.

You're 100% right--Violence solves a lot of problems. Of course its best to first threaten and graphically explain said violence. Use jason@porkjerky.com to start the process on me.
There I was, titty fucking some random skank's nipples off, wondering if that was enough or if I needed to do something else completely pointless for breast cancer. If only there was a gesture equally as empty as wearing a pink bracelet or having a bake sale or throwing a magnetic ribbon on my car or walking with a herd of heifers for 5 kilometers. Something that would show my hollow support without taking any actual effort nor furthering the cause in any real way. Then it hit me like a ton of boobs. This and every October, porkjerky.com will go pink as a lip service tribute to breast cancer. Please follow my magnanimous example and do something meaninglessly worthless that doesn't require any real effort on your part for this great cause. Believe me when I say, it should be the least we can do.