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R.I.P.->Immortalizing David Stewart II With Garbage

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Memorial For David Stewart II

Just when you thought it was safe to drive on the correct side of the road again...

David Stewart II: This Time Its Suicide

Christ Sortamighty, I look like as big a doofus as David Stewart II was. Granted, there isn't any photographic evidence of him leaning over a shittily decorated, banged up guard rail with a goofy-ass look on his face to back up my doofus accusations. But I think we can all agree that one can only look so cool after crossing the median and losing a headbutting contest with an SUV.

Have your attorney use jason@porkjerky.com when making good on your threats to sue me for being an asshole. Of course, the same guy who handled your back child support and DUI cases probably isn't the best representation in this civil matter.