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R.I.P.->Commemorating David Stewart II With Garbage

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David Stewart II
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Memorial For David Stewart II

Just when you thought it was safe to drive on the correct side of the road again...

David Stewart II: This Time Its Suicide

Christ Sortamighty, I look like as big a doofus as David Stewart II was. Granted, there isn't any photographic evidence of him leaning over a shittily decorated, banged up guard rail with a goofy-ass look on his face to back up my doofus accusations. But I think we can all agree that one can only look so cool after crossing the median and losing a headbutting contest with an SUV.

I am one misspelling filled hate mail away from repenting, apologizing and giving my life over to christ. Send yours to jason@porkjerky.com. I am sure it will be the one.