Not The Smartest Turd In The Urinal

R.I.P.->Glorifying Max Stegall & Jesse Davison With Shit

    Email Page To Someone   Create A Link For This Page   Be An Idiot, Click Here
Next Cross -->
<-- Prior Cross
R.I.P. Main Submit A Cross Make Your Own Roadside Memorial
Don't Take My Word For It.
Here Are My Sources For
Max Stegall & Jesse Davison
Online ArticleStegall Obituary
Memorial For Max Stegall & Jesse Davison

These might be the first 2 crosses I've come across that could actually be used in a real crucifixion. I don't know why you'd mention that. But technically you are correct, I guess. Kind of a weird thing for someone to vocalize, but since you mentioned it and are so adamant about being recognized for being correct, I guess a lot of the other memorials on my site could in fact be used to crucify toddlers or infants.

Yes, okay, or small animals. You sure have given this a lot of thought. Jesus.

Here I am, getting ready to light heartedly help people shit on the memories of Max Stegall and Jesse Davison and you have to be Dickhead Downer by bringing up baby crucifixions.

Fuck. Way to bum everyone out.

I was well on my way to a pullitzer with this one too. I had those big ass crosses to work with, one had a football helmet on it and the other a racing helmet. I'm sure I could have had some really witty shit about that. Then there's that Batman thing with Max's name on it that would have been good for a laugh or 7. But now all I can think about are crucified children. Way to go.

Anyway, at 4:52 on 4/27/2008 near Burlington Junction, MO, Jesse Davison was driving Max Stegall when he slid off a wet road and hit an embankment. Neither were wearing seatbelts and both died.

Then again, if it wasn't too bloody and you could get the bastards to stop crying, wouldn't a baby crucifixion just be the fucking cutest? Tiny crown of thorn on their heads. Some sort of loin cloth diaper. Maybe get a litter of golden retriever puppies to jump up and frolic around the base. I don't have the inside written yet or a purpose for it, but Hallmark's definitely getting another unsolicited submission from me.

For your convenience, use jason@porkjerky.com to send all prayers for my soul and salvation, as well as any idle threats (lawsuits, death, property, bodily harm, etc.) you need to make.