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R.I.P.->Honoring A Valentine Corpse With Garbage

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Memorial For A Valentine Corpse

Dumbass 1:Awwww fuck. Our friend died and got done killed.
Dumbass 2:Yeah, I guess we gotta put up a cross.
Dumbass 1:Yup, and it's gonna be the best one ever.
Dumbass 2:No doubt. Let's go balls out on this one. We can put..., ummm we can have a...
Dumbass 1:Oh yeah, for sure. We'll take a..., well we could get our...
Dumbass 2:Ok, we will start with a cross.
Dumbass 1:Fucking-A, that rules hard.
Dumbass 2:Then we need to write something touching and sentimental on it.
Dumbass 1:Like 'Miss You' or 'Love You'.
Dumbass 2:Ohh god yeah. How about both? One across and the other going down.
Dumbass 1:Sweet. That rocks my nuts off. But what else?
Dumbass 2:Well, Valentines is soon. Let's do something with that.
Dumbass 1:I can steal 2 plastic sparkly heart things from the truck stop.
Dumbass 2:That fucking rules. This is gonna be so motherfucking cool.
Dumbass 1:Shouldn't we put his name on it somewhere?
Dumbass 2:That's stupid. We are already doing the plastic sparkly heart thing. Let's get started.
In Unison:Ok, but first things first, let's sniff some glue and beat each other off.

(lights dim, curtain closes, wait for ovation, then curtain call)

As openly a callous prick that I am, it amazes me that people still overestimate my ability to care or think that I value their opinions. Prove me right at jason@porkjerky.com.