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R.I.P.->Memorializing An Anonymous Speedbump With Trash

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Memorial For An Anonymous Speedbump

I came upon this memorial while driving on I-29, which, if I had been carjacked by a clinically depressed, homeward bound sioux indian, I could take all the way to South Dakota. As we all know, South Dakota has made its claim to fame as being the state south of North Dakota; which conversely, is famous for being the state north of South Dakota.

Further, South Dakota is the state of origin for that banged up license plate in the photo. Other than that, I don't have any evidence (which has never stopped me from passing anything off as fact before), but I think that this is a memorial for yet another in the many "family suicides" we hear about taking place in the Dakotas. Obviously, they were returning home to South Dakota when they all realized that they were returning home to South Dakota. Every parent wants their children to have it better than they themselves did.

So, these South Dakotan parents turned to the only thing that would give their children that: Oncoming traffic.

I know what you are thinking and you couldn't be more right. Someone needs to e-mail me at jason@porkjerky.com and tell me how little my dick is and how horribly I need to die.