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An Anonymous Speedbump South DakotaNorth Dakota
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I came upon this memorial while driving on I-29, which, if I had been carjacked by a clinically depressed, homeward bound sioux indian, I could take
all the way to South Dakota. As we all know, South Dakota has made its claim
to fame as being the state south of North Dakota; which conversely, is
famous for being the state north of South Dakota.
Further, South Dakota is the state of origin for that banged up license plate in the photo. Other than that, I don't have any evidence (which has
never stopped me from passing anything off as fact before), but I think that this is a memorial for yet another in the many "family suicides" we hear
about taking place in the Dakotas. Obviously, they were returning home to South Dakota when they all realized that they were returning home to
South Dakota. Every parent wants their children to have it better than they themselves did.
So, these South Dakotan parents turned to the only thing that would give their children that: Oncoming traffic.
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There I was, titty fucking some random skank's nipples off, wondering if that was enough or if I needed to do something else completely pointless for breast cancer. If only there was a gesture equally as empty as wearing a pink bracelet or having a bake sale or throwing a magnetic ribbon on my car or walking with a herd of heifers for 5 kilometers. Something that would show my hollow support without taking any actual effort nor furthering the cause in any real way. Then it hit me like a ton of boobs. This and every October, porkjerky.com will go pink as a lip service tribute to breast cancer. Please follow my magnanimous example and do something meaninglessly worthless that doesn't require any real effort on your part for this great cause. Believe me when I say, it should be the least we can do.