Thanks for everything. I know you don't know me nor my fiancee, but you have helped us immensely. We listen to your
show every Monday and Friday. Unfortunately, we are too busy the other night to be together, but we are religious about
keeping our 'Delilah Dates' twice a week.
Jen is everything I have ever wanted and needed in a woman. She's sweet, nice, a person I can talk to, someone I can
always count on, and without being too graphic, she has her naughty side too, which drives me wild. I am so happy to just
have someone like her in my life, much less be willing to commit her life and soul to mine. She will become Mrs. Les J.
Cursason on February 21, 2000. Thank you and the Good Lord.
I do have a question for you I don't think I can ask anyone else. Its a question of cold feet--I hope. I know being nervous
about marriage is typical for anyone to go through, but the way my cold feet is being projected on me is quite frightening.
Let me first state that before finding Christ I was into what is now called the "S and M" lifestyle, and possibly this is why my
cold feet is being expressed as it is. Fortunately, I found Jesus Christ: my Lord, Light and Savior, and went through a
vigorous rehabilitation program offered through my Parish to cure me of this deviance from God's Way. I hope what I am
going through is just my past's manifestation of itself in the form of my nervousness about my big life decision with Jen.
Delilah, I have been dreaming, day dreaming, fantasizing and planning a sadistic, ritualistic, sacrificial sexual episode that
involves bestiality, masochism and my sweet Jen as the focal point of the episode. Over the last couple months I have had
this recurring fantasy that begins with the severe and brutal beating of Jen in front of everyone we know. I just bash her
until she is unrecognizable, bloody and pleading for me to stop. I continue to abuse her until I start dismembering and
disemboweling Jen's mangled torso with a saber given to me by my grandfather who got it off of a Korean Corporal from the
Landing of Inchon.
Anyway, I know this is most likely just my quote, unquote cold feet, and I should continue on with the wedding plans, but It
would really set my mind at ease to just hear you say it. What I described above was always the ultimate fantasy of mine
before I got cured through the healing powers of Christianity, but it always involved a different girl. So, I am virtually certain that
because this fantasy now always includes Jen, it is my subconscious way of saying to myself 'Hey, Les, she really is the one,
Thanks for everything and God Bless.
Les J Cursason