There I was, titty fucking some random skank's nipples off, wondering if that was enough or if I needed to do something else completely pointless for breast cancer. If only there was a gesture equally as empty as wearing a pink bracelet or having a bake sale or throwing a magnetic ribbon on my car or walking with a herd of heifers for 5 kilometers. Something that would show my hollow support without taking any actual effort nor furthering the cause in any real way. Then it hit me like a ton of boobs. This and every October, porkjerky.com will go pink as a lip service tribute to breast cancer. Please follow my magnanimous example and do something meaninglessly worthless that doesn't require any real effort on your part for this great cause. Believe me when I say, it should be the least we can do.

Porkjerky.com

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R.I.P.->Immortalizing Ronald Burhardt & Glen With Trash

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Don't Take My Word For It.
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Ronald Burhardt & Glen

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Time and again we have seen that when a car driving dumbass takes on a teamster that the 18 wheeler wins by TKO. Everytime. But what happens when you play crash 'em up derby with 2 big rigs?

On 12/13/03 Glen from Marquette, NE decided he was dumbassed enough to find out. Technically it was a no-decision draw, but at least he took someone out with him. Being a trucker, Glen must have been tired of always driving westbound in the westbound lane, and wanted to see what it would be like to do so in the eastbound lane for a change. Turns out not fun. He hit Ronald E. Burhardt's 18 wheeler head on and they both died.

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I know what you are thinking and you couldn't be more right. Someone needs to e-mail me at jason@porkjerky.com and tell me how little my dick is and how horribly I need to die.