There I was, titty fucking some random skank's nipples off, wondering if that was enough or if I needed to do something else completely pointless for breast cancer. If only there was a gesture equally as empty as wearing a pink bracelet or having a bake sale or throwing a magnetic ribbon on my car or walking with a herd of heifers for 5 kilometers. Something that would show my hollow support without taking any actual effort nor furthering the cause in any real way. Then it hit me like a ton of boobs. This and every October, porkjerky.com will go pink as a lip service tribute to breast cancer. Please follow my magnanimous example and do something meaninglessly worthless that doesn't require any real effort on your part for this great cause. Believe me when I say, it should be the least we can do.
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R.I.P.->Glorifying Lacey Johnston, Rachel Persell & Lacey Hammons With Garbage

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Lacey Johnston, Rachel Persell & Lacey Hammons
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Memorial For Lacey Johnston, Rachel Persell & Lacey Hammons

A Lesson You Can't Learn The Hardway

Don't pass cars by swerving into oncoming traffic (Lacey L. Johnston). No matter how much of a hurry you are to get to somewhere, the afterlife excluded, take your time and allow the car in front of you to complete its turn, then feel free to stomp on the gas like a mad man/woman/shitty teen driver to impress/endanger the people who are stupid enough to get in a car with you (Rachel M. Persell). The people in the other lane (Lacey J. Hammons) will thank you. And no shit eating dumbass (Jason Curless) (Hey look ma, my name's in parenthesis -- I finally made it) will show up to marvel at the wonderous trash that was left as a monument to your shitty driving.

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There I was, titty fucking some random skank's nipples off, wondering if that was enough or if I needed to do something else completely pointless for breast cancer. If only there was a gesture equally as empty as wearing a pink bracelet or having a bake sale or throwing a magnetic ribbon on my car or walking with a herd of heifers for 5 kilometers. Something that would show my hollow support without taking any actual effort nor furthering the cause in any real way. Then it hit me like a ton of boobs. This and every October, porkjerky.com will go pink as a lip service tribute to breast cancer. Please follow my magnanimous example and do something meaninglessly worthless that doesn't require any real effort on your part for this great cause. Believe me when I say, it should be the least we can do.