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Porkjerky Prose
The Best Roadside Cross Story
Do It Yourself Porn Tips
The Best Roadside Cross
Make Your Own Roadside Memorial
September 11th Remembrance
Submit A Roadside Memorial
The Porkjerky Gallery
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Bored at work, but too new, naive, prissy or porky to masturbate underneath your desk? Well, this will provide you with seconds upon seconds of entertainment. In the form above, enter the full url of a website, select a translation, then click the button. The site you selected will pop up and be translated as you command.
Or, use the below form to translate some text of your own. Copy in an office memo or paste an email from your boss or just type in the preamble to the constitution (they made you memorize it for a reason) and click the button to convert it.
Okay, here's how all those buttons work--its like the memory buttons on a calculator. I know, I know, me too. Those fucking M+, MC, MR and MS buttons are as worthless as tits on a retard, but the ones above are a little easier to use. First, enter whatever text you want, then click 'Keep Text', that stores what appears in the text area. Then you can convert your text or what not, and when you want to get back to the text you saved, click the 'Reload Text' button and whatever you saved will be put back in. 'Clear Text' simply deletes all text in the box. Godspeed.
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There I was, titty fucking some random skank's nipples off, wondering if that was enough or if I needed to do something else completely pointless for breast cancer. If only there was a gesture equally as empty as wearing a pink bracelet or having a bake sale or throwing a magnetic ribbon on my car or walking with a herd of heifers for 5 kilometers. Something that would show my hollow support without taking any actual effort nor furthering the cause in any real way. Then it hit me like a ton of boobs. This and every October, porkjerky.com will go pink as a lip service tribute to breast cancer. Please follow my magnanimous example and do something meaninglessly worthless that doesn't require any real effort on your part for this great cause. Believe me when I say, it should be the least we can do.