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R.I.P.->Glorifying Kevin Shields With Crap

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Kevin Shields
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Memorial For Kevin Shields

In the sincerest way I can, while setting up a joke, I truly feel for the family of Kevin Shields. Not only did they lose someone they loved, but the date he died will never be a holiday filled with celebration and merriment. Nope, from now on, for them, whenever that date comes around on the calendar they won't feel like stuffing stockings or decorating a tree or carolling throughout their neighborhood or even exchanging gifts.

Nope, for those who loved Kevin Shields September 11th (specifically 9/11/2011) will just be the day Kevin drove his dumb ass into that highway sign and died.

A 9/11 that is forever linked with sorrow and loss? My heart, in continuing with the joke's setup, goes out to them. I'm glad my 9/11 isn't ruined with any such traumatic emotional event.

I'm surprised no one has thought of your excellent idea before. Sending a profanity filled email to jason@porkjerky.com wishing death upon me will definitely change my holocaustal ways.