There I was, titty fucking some random skank's nipples off, wondering if that was enough or if I needed to do something else completely pointless for breast cancer. If only there was a gesture equally as empty as wearing a pink bracelet or having a bake sale or throwing a magnetic ribbon on my car or walking with a herd of heifers for 5 kilometers. Something that would show my hollow support without taking any actual effort nor furthering the cause in any real way. Then it hit me like a ton of boobs. This and every October, porkjerky.com will go pink as a lip service tribute to breast cancer. Please follow my magnanimous example and do something meaninglessly worthless that doesn't require any real effort on your part for this great cause. Believe me when I say, it should be the least we can do.
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R.I.P.->Glorifying Tanner D. Twitchell With Trash

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Tanner D. Twitchell
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Memorial For Tanner D. Twitchell

Oh god, its happening. Get the children. Stock up on canned food, bottle water, ammo and bibles. Move to the cellar, turn on the AM radio and just try to survive.

As foretold by a wise man, its all coming true. My dream is being realized.

Everything I found, virtual and real-world, commemorating Tanner D. Twitchell's symbolize the entering of what I like to call the hybrid period of shitty memorials. Hopefully its a transitional period and not the final stage. Not only did Tanner D. Twitchell get a real-life, hard copy version of a shitty memorial that someone crapped out onto a literal highway and will one day will fall into disrepair and junk up the scenery to annoy everyone--he got a ton of fucking virtual shitty memorials that themselves have fallen into various stages of disrepair and are junking up the side of the information highway.

When I googled 'Tanner Twitchell', I initiall thought I found a shit ton of pages for him and his death. Wrong. While I did find a couple of stories about his demise, I also found a shit ton of dead links to pages that used to be about him and his death. Facebook, myspace, YouTube, even his own url all popped up on my search. But social media, like time and trash in a ditch, moves on. His memory is now a shitty green cross somewhere in Jackson County, MO and a ton of broken and dead links on the web. His memory may live on in someone's heart, but in the cache of google, his legacy is on life support at best.

What a great new world we live in. Now instead of just a shitty pile of lumber, tattered flags, smashed pinwheels, mildewing stuffed animals and weather beaten plastic flower stems; add Page Not Found errors, broken links and dead images to your deceased loved ones' memories.

As always: They would have wanted it that way.

Send hate mail, death threats and proof of your illiteracy to jason@porkjerky.com. Remember, 'Fuck you.' is a complete sentence; 'You infected ass-polyp' is just a fragment.
There I was, titty fucking some random skank's nipples off, wondering if that was enough or if I needed to do something else completely pointless for breast cancer. If only there was a gesture equally as empty as wearing a pink bracelet or having a bake sale or throwing a magnetic ribbon on my car or walking with a herd of heifers for 5 kilometers. Something that would show my hollow support without taking any actual effort nor furthering the cause in any real way. Then it hit me like a ton of boobs. This and every October, porkjerky.com will go pink as a lip service tribute to breast cancer. Please follow my magnanimous example and do something meaninglessly worthless that doesn't require any real effort on your part for this great cause. Believe me when I say, it should be the least we can do.