Tushy Von Heineybottom, M.D.

I like to think that somewhere, somehow, someone’s life was saved by an overzealous proctologist. A guy who serendipitously comes upon a person with an as yet undiagnosed medical emergency of their butt. And because of the overzealous proctologist’s knowledge and immediate action the guy is saved from an agonizing and eminent [...]

The Crapalypse

I should probably have sought legal advice before posting this picture. I’m sure this is going to be used as evidence against me at my trial. I’m definitely sure I’m violating my Miranda rights on this one. What I did to that toilet can’t be legal.

Tar black, smelling of death, [...]

When I'm president I'm going to make it a law that everyone learn that the executive branch doesn't make laws. Provided of course a bill authorizing me to make that law gets introduced in the legislature, passed by both houses and delivered to me for my signature. On second thought, I'll just make it an executive order.